Friday, April 27, 2012

That Time I Went To Wendy's on West Nursery Farm Road and Never Went Back (and Other Fast Food Stories)

The picture next to these words, the one giving you nightmares, is what I saw as soon as I walked into the Wendy's on West Nursery Farm Road in Linthicum, MD.  I was going to a movie with my girlfriend Kelly (And this weeks' co-blogger, say hi Kelly..."Hi"...real original, Kel, way to bring the enthusiasm, if you all stop reading now I don't blame you) and we decided to get some food first.

So we walk into the Wendy's next to the theater and the kid at the register, let's call him "Ryan" cuz that was his name, is working or whatever.  So we wait in line (A pretty busy line, don't you hate when you get somewhere, the line is a mile long, and you're the last one in it until you get to the front of the line?  Then one jackass walks in behind you and gets his food before you.), we are cracking smart ass comments, and of course I'm being well behaved and mature, per the usual.

This is why unemployment is so high
(literally). Thanks, Ryan.
We finally get to the front of the line and I'm staring at "Ryan" cuz he looks like, as my dad would say, "a damn fool".  He had  hair like that guy in that band "Flock of Seagulls" (You know, who doesn't wanna name a band after birds that eat garbage?), a band I know about only cuz I've seen "The Wedding Singer".

So me and Kelly get up to the front of the line and place our orders.  I ordered, and apparently messed up, and "Ryan" just smirked at me.  I corrected myself and stepped back, in shame (Also per the usual) and Kelly ordered. Disclaimer: he messed up Kelly's order, smirkless.

After Kelly had ordered, I handed "Ryan" my money and he took it and kind of (Well, not kind of) stared at Kelly blankly, then at me, then at Kelly, then rung up our food.

So we got our food and went to sit down and as Kelly opened up her baked potato, she noticed they didn't give her any sour cream or butter.  So me, being the gentleman and perfect boyfriend (Kelly says "Hi"), I get up to go get some sour cream and butter from "Ryan" (If you can't tell, I get a kick out of typing "'Ryan'").  I get up to the register and ask "Ryan" for said condiments, he looked at me, then turned back to the customer who had just told him "I'm not ready to order yet."  I stood there for a minute feeling a little bit defeated, watching the lady with two cigarettes behind her ears flip burgers, until "Drive Thru Lady" came to my rescue.

All in all, it was a trip to Wendy's (A place I really don't like) I'll remember.  Oh, and I almost forgot, Kelly pointed out a sign to me as we walked into Wendy's that read "Looking for Great Team Members"...now we know why...Way to go "Ryan".

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

My Year on the Road - Part One

Disclaimer - I've been "resting on my laurels" or as humans say, sitting on my lazy ass, on this post for a while.  These travel posts are coming almost a year over due.  In 2011, I traveled more than any other year.  Hoppins from coast to coast, north to south, airport to airport, hotel to hotel, and endless bus ride to steamboat ride.

Where did I go you ask?  Well, I blazed through time zones to Alaska and back with my family, drove up scenic (And porn filled) Route 15 to Buffalo with one of my best friends, and went up to the home of the Green Monsta(The City Of Boston) with my best friend/girlfriend.

So let me start with trip one, July and my family trek across the United States to Alaska.  Land of Whales, Bears, Palin (Vomit {Boo, hiss.  Sorry family, I know I'm the Black Sheep, deal with it}), and beautiful country side.

So I decided instead of making this a multi part post, I'd turn it into a picture post.  Here we go.

Seattle Airport, the longest layover on the trip but it was an awesome airport.  


Fairbanks, Alaska at 10pm.  This was one of the first things we saw when we landed and got to the hotel.



Our excursion in Fairbanks was on the Steamboat Discovery III

Roughly 60% of Alaskan citizens have their pilots license due to lack of major highway systems. 
Suddenly, puppies.

Rest stop on the bus ride from Fairbanks to Denali.


Denali's Resort.  Our second stop on the trip.

A moose chick crossing the road in Denali National Park behind our bus.

"The Great One" aka Denali, photo taken from 40 miles away.


We rode to the boat in style.




Whale watching with Capitan Rick.

Mendenhall Glacier.



Lumberjack Competition in Ketchican, the last stop on the trip.



So that's it.  If you have more questions or wanna see more pictures, e-mail me or leave a comment below and I'll glady send you more.  Next up, Travel Log Buffalo Style.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Word Vomit, or as some people say "Random Thoughts"

So I haven't done a post like this in forever, cuz the Man Crush bracket took up all of my time so it feels good to be back in the regular-post saddle.  I also want to take a second to thank everyone who voted and contributed to the Man Crush Bracket, it sounds like a lot of people enjoyed it and I'll do another bracket either later this year or next year.  Now back to the voodoo that I do (not)so well.

Everyone who has been into a Chinese "joint" or restaurant (I never spell that word right on the first time, thanks spell check)  has probably the sign in the picture below (Take time to scroll down a bit to see it).  They seem to be in like, 90% of the places I've been, and I'm almost nervous when I go somewhere and I don't see one, I worry I'm not classy enough to order anything that's not no a backlit and faded sign.

Every Chinese Restaurant


Now, the sign in the picture is in Top China across the street from my house, it's a brand new place, and the sign looks like it's thirty years old.  I've never seen one of these signs and thought "Damn, what a clean, crisp, new looking sign."  And I also don't remember seeing any changes in the signs.  It always seems dumpings, General Tso, Orange Chicken, and stuff are just up there all the time.  The signs must be family heirlooms, passed generation to generation.

Random thought number two, cuz one is never enough.  And cuz I'm all hopped up on strawberry rhubarb pie from Easter, also known as the best pie ever.  Sorry, other pies.  I was driving the other day, rocking out to my music (Rod Stewart, DUH...not really) and I look out the passenger window and the Cracka in the Volvo station wagon (Matt James) next to me and he's staring back at me, while he sings whatever was on his stereo.  I feel like this happens a lot, mostly I'm the one singing (And drumming on the steering wheel, occasionally playing guitar, and certainly thinking I sound just as good as John Hiatt...or Rihanna), and what do you do?  You look back ahead and continue singing...like nothing happened.

Well that's all I got for now, I'm working on some new stuff (Maybe a interview type thing with "Cruz Missile") so stay tuned Aunt Jean.

Hostess.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Bracket Winner...

<h2>And now, your 2012 Man Crush Bracket Winner is...</h2>


Denzel Motha'Effin' Washington.

No, but seriously. Warn ya mothas.  That's a wrap.